"Governor Perry, I am experiencing mid-cycle cramping. Is this a punishment from god for not getting pregnant this month?"
"Dear Governor Perry, I’m confused why insurance would cover Viagra but not female contraception. Clearly, as a Christian, you realize God blesses only certain men with limp dicks so that those men do not father children. I look forward to your response."
"Mr Perry. I was considering jacking off…thought I should ask you if it was OK first. Reply soon. Losing wood. Thanks."
"Governor, my wife can’t get pregnant. Should I just shoot her, or go find another one like Newt did?"